Can’t believe they’re still sacrificing virgins for their beautiful hair. What is this, the Dark Ages?? #thatsnothowthisworks #thatsnothowanyofthisworks #orisit?
I needed this today. You need this today. And every day after that.
Everything is going to be okay. I promise. I wouldn’t lie to you. Trust me.
Everything is going to be okay, even though its not and we all die.
That is the truth. This reminds me of an old fable. A tale. It’s called the Scorpion and the Frog, and it goes something like this: The scorpion lied! The scorpion stung the frog! Now they’re both dead!
The moral of the story is simple: choice is an illusion. Unless you’re talking about nacho chips, then you have at least one solid choice and that’s cool ranch.
Other than that, only god has choices and that’s why he never answers prayers.
Oh! I remember another fable about a raccoon that fell down a wishing well full of glittering coins and was never seen or heard from again.
The moral of that story is, I think, don’t trust moonlight?